If you think health care is expensive now, wait until you see what it costs when it's free!

In general, the art of government consists of taking as much money as possible from one party of the citizens to give to the other.

Just because you do not take an interest in politics doesn't mean politics won't take an interest in you!

No man's life, liberty, or property is safe while the legislature is in session.

Talk is cheap ... except when Congress does it.

The government is like a baby's alimentary canal, with a happy appetite at one end and no responsibility at the other.

The inherent vice of capitalism is the unequal sharing of the blessings. The inherent blessing of socialism is the equal sharing of misery.

The only difference between a tax man and a taxidermist is that the taxidermist leaves the skin.

There is no distinctly Native American criminal class...save Congress.

What this country needs are more unemployed politicians.

A government big enough to give you everything you want, is strong enough to take everything you have.

It is always easier to believe than to deny. Our minds are naturally affirmative.

Estimated amount of glucose used by an adult human brain each day, expressed in M&Ms: 250

The outcome of any serious research can only be to make two questions grow where only one grew before.

Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it.

One can always be kind to people about whom one cares nothing.

Don't knock the weather. If it didn't change once in a while, nine out of ten people couldn't start a conversation.

A conference is a gathering of important people who singly can do nothing, but together can decide that nothing can be done.

Women should be obscene and not heard.

If it weren't for my lawyer, I'd still be in prison. It went a lot faster with two people digging.