Formerly, when religion was strong and science weak, men mistook magic for medicine; now, when science is strong and religion weak, men mistake medicine for magic.

He was one of those men who think that the world can be saved by writing a pamphlet.

People are, if anything, more touchy about being thought silly than they are about being thought unjust.

To do just the opposite is also a form of imitation.

Seek simplicity, and distrust it.

If you have any doubts that we live in a society controlled by men, try reading down the index of contributors to a volume of quotations, looking for women's names.

In journalism, there has always been a tension between getting it first and getting it right.

In real life, unlike in Shakespeare, the sweetness of the rose depends upon the name it bears. Things are not only what they are. They are, in very important respects, what they seem to be.

Everything is funny as long as it is happening to Somebody Else.

When Solomon said there was a time and a place for everything he had not encountered the problem of parking his automobile.

By the time a man realizes that maybe his father was right, he usually has a son who thinks he's wrong.

People demand freedom of speech as a compensation for the freedom of thought which they seldom use.

If God lived on earth, people would break his windows.

It may be true that the law cannot make a man love me, but it can stop him from lynching me, and I think that's pretty important.

I shall never be ashamed of citing a bad author if the line is good.

Those who dream by day are cognizant of many things which escape those who dream only by night.

What happens when the future has come and gone?

If you put tomfoolery into a computer, nothing comes out of it but tomfoolery. But this tomfoolery, having passed through a very expensive machine, is somehow ennobled and no-one dares criticize it.

We are here on Earth to do good to others. What the others are here for, I don't know.

Household tasks are easier and quicker when they are done by somebody else.